gphitman's Diaryland Diary

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Apologies. I'm a Semi-Ignorant Sports Fan

Derek Jeter is out today with a nondisplaced wrist fracture.

The best shortstop ever is at The Yankees' disposal and where is he playing while Jeter-the-pretty-boy is on the bench?

Third base.

It just pisses me off. I hate that overrated, overpaid, slumping...

So they've got one of their second baseman at SS and A-Rod still stands ready at third. As I write this, the game is still at 0-0 in the ninth inning, anyway, but COME ON!

I still stand by my Joe-Torre-drunk-theory. Get the guy wasted, mess with his mind. I'm so sure he can be convinced to switch those guys up one day just for shits and giggles. I'll see this done in my lifetime.

12:30 pm - 07.22.04

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Newsbreak

This just in!

Available as of today for download in iTunes!

DAVID HASSELHOFF!

Don't tell me you're not excited...

I am so glad I was notified otherwise I may have continued to download hipper and trendier music. Phew!

9:09 am - 07.21.04

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Deep Thoughts

So I get a lot of junkmail at my hotmail account. I am sure you all get the same handful of garbage. Promises of riches, tips on how to increase YOUR penis size, job offers, lucrative real estate proposals, etc.

But here is one the always catches my attention. The subject and the e-mail address match: BeHung4aWoman.

Is it suggesting that you COULD be hung for your woman if only you click here (directed at men)? Or is it saying that for a WOMAN, you could be pretty damned well hung...

I've already invested far too much time thinking about it. I'm so ashamed.

Back to work.

3:30 pm - 07.20.04

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HICCUP WATCH: HOUR EIGHT

Just when you think it's safe...

HICCUP!

It's astounding. They just keep coming back for more. They taunt me. They tease me.

God, I look (and feel) like crap today. I've gotta be coming down with something.

5:21 pm - 07.19.04

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HICCUP WATCH: HOUR SIX

MAKE THEM STOP!

It hurts! It hurts!

You know, there is nothing worse when part of your job is answering the god damned phones...

"How may I -- *HIC!* -- help you?"

SHIT!

2:51 pm - 07.19.04

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