gphitman's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Faking it I had sushi for lunch today. And it was good. I went to Vegas this past weekend. I am still recovering. And that was good too. Maybe now what I am feeling could best be described as the "I had a fabulous weekend and now I have to be back at work BLUES" - I need to pull myself out of this slump. But one of the girls at the office said I've been in a better mood today than I have been in ages, so apparently I am faking it quite well. 5:02 pm - 04.20.04 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Brainstorm If they sold common sense in a can, the world would be a much better place. Seriously. 5:16 pm - 04.15.04 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Pearl in the Rough I just saw a deeply disturbing commercial. A boy and a girl are sitting in a little fishing boat on a lovely day out in the middle of the lake. The grass around the lake is green and fragrant (not that I can smell it, but hell, you figure it), and sky is blue, and birds chirp gleefully as boy and girl smile at one another- you just wanna puke over the new love... Oops! Boat springs a leak. Fear not! The boyfriend assures girlfriend he can fix this... Not to be outdone, girlfriend pulls an entire fucking BOX of PEARL TAMPONS out of her purse and uses but ONE tampon to clog the leak (that's how strong these are, you see). In an instant, the spongy cotton soaks up all the water that has seeped into their dingy, tampon string dangling in the breeze. Job well done, sister-girlfriend. Amen. EW? Okay, this is wrong on many, many levels. I don't think I've been to subtle in my description, but let me REALLY spell it out for the less gifted among you. Oh SURE, I carry around a BOX of tampons just in case of pesky leaks. And not just mine. You never know. The boat, the car, the roof... Handy little contraptions, they are. Other than that, I find the obvious dangling of the sopping tampon and string really sick for some reason. And the fact that her boyfriend is impressed and not repulsed by this or at the very least humored by this, is not only unrealistic, but just really, really- well- ICKY! EW?! I've also been told of this nastiness-- this KY commercial making the rounds on Daytime TV? STOP THE MADNESS! See also: 10.30.03: Cleavage, Give Thy Wisdom 11:52 pm - 04.14.04 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Quote of the Day "And in a daring bid to disprove the slogan 'once you pop, you just can't stop,' I ate only one Pringle. For my next act of commercial disobedience, I might go to McDonald's and think I'm only moderately enjoyin' it." Hee, hee! What a fabulous line. 10:48 am - 04.14.04 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hump Day Good morning, boys and girls! I must be tense, for I feel the compulsive urge to clean everything. Now would be the perfect time to invite me over to your place. That's free advice. Work has sucked hard-core ASS for the past couple of days, whereas normally, I suppose it would only qualify for minor ass-suckage. Yesterday was misery at it's greatest capacity. But good things in my life right now:
And now, excerpts from my interior-monologue this morning on the elevator... -Oh, bad run in your pantyhose, honey. Shoulda changed those before you left the house. Sucks to be you. -Really getting sick of those mini-van commercials. What happened to all the toilet-paper commercials with the puppies? -Must pack for trip, must pack for the trip. Shit, I hate packing. I always forget something important... Like underwear. Ick. -What the hell smells like salami in here?
9:28 am - 04.14.04 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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